SATISFACTION GUARANTEED
ABOUT THE AUTHOR
OPTIONAL HOME STUDY PROGRAM
COST
TABLE OF CONTENTS
EXCERPTS

A PARENT'S HANDBOOK:
HOW TO OBTAIN COUNSELING SERVICES FOR YOUR CHILD

Parents Will Learn:

• How to determine if their child may need mental health or substance abuse treatment
• The different levels of mental health services
• How to deal with their insurance providers & the different types of insurance coverage
• How to select the most appropriate outpatient treatment provider
• How to prepare their child for the initial individual outpatient therapy session
• How to handle a child who refuses to attend treatment
• What to do if their child experiences a psychiatric emergency
• What to do if their child requires inpatient treatment
• How to understand their child’s diagnosis and it’s implication for treatment
• Important information regarding prescription psychotropic medications
• Listing of all NJ screening centers, their addresses and telephone numbers
• Listing of all self-help organizations, their web pages, telephone addresses and telephone numbers
• Listing of leading mental health organizations, their web addresses, telephone numbers and web pages

This handbook was written from the prospective of a school counselor/private practitioner who has conducted hundreds of parent meetings over his fourteen-year career. It will provide parents with all the information, validation and support they need to obtain effective counseling services for their child. Parents and School Counseling Professionals are guaranteed to find it an invaluable resource. If you are not 100% satisfied with the handbook, return it no explanation required and you will receive a full refund. This money back guarantee is good for thirty days from the date you receive your order.

Bernard Ivin grew up in Jersey City, New Jersey. He is a graduate of Moravian College (1988) in Bethlehem, Pennsylvania and Rutgers University School of Social Work (1993) in New Brunswick, New Jersey. At Moravian Bernard played basketball and earned many athletic honors including small college All-American. In 1998 Bernard was inducted into the Moravian College Sports Hall of Fame.

Bernard’s professional credentials include a License in Clinical Social Work, Certification in Alcohol and Substance Abuse Counseling, Certification in Level One Eye Movement Desensitization Reprocessing Therapy and extensive training in Cognitive Behavioral Therapy. He began his school-counseling career as a Crisis Intervention Counselor for the New York City Board of Education. Currently, Bernard is employed as a Student Assistance Coordinator for a Morris County New Jersey school district and is the founder and director of Strength for Change Counseling and Self Development Center.

Bernard has developed many successful school-based programs for students at risk. His "Motivational Cognitive Behavioral Counseling Model" approach is based on the principles of Client-Centered Therapy, Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, Change Stage Theory and Motivational Interviewing Theory. Bernard facilitates numerous professional development workshops on the topics of I&RS (formerly known as PAC/Core) team effectiveness, in-school counseling, motivating students and working with "difficult" students.

Bernard wrote "A Parent’s Handbook: How to Obtain Counseling Services For Your Child" in direct response to the many questions and concerns expressed by parents when trying to obtain counseling services for their child. The mission of this handbook is to educate, validate and support parents in the difficult task of obtaining effective mental health or substance abuse treatment for their child. In addition, the hope is that this resource will assist school counseling professionals in increasing the likelihood that parents follow through with the school’s recommendation that they obtain counseling services for their child.

This handbook is available with a home study program that provides school counseling professionals the opportunity to learn it’s content and earn 6 professional development CEUs. The home study program requires that participants read the handbook and complete and return (to the publisher) the accompanying work packet that includes a 20-question exam and essay questions. Upon a review of the completed materials and a passing score on the test, participants will receive a certificate for 6 CEUs. If a participant fails the information competency test, he/she will be able to retake it until a passing score is achieved.

1. Individual handbooks = $6.00 per handbook
2. Pack of 10 handbooks = $35
3. Pack of 25 handbooks = $85
4. Pack of 50 = $165
5. Pack of 75 = $225
6. Pack of 100 = $280
7. 125 & 300 = 2.60 per handbook
8. 301 and up = please contact for special pricing

Optional - Home Study Program = $35 per course

SECTION 1 – DETERMINING IF YOUR CHILD NEEDS COUNSELING SERVICES

• Behaviors And Other Risk Indicators

SECTION 2 – UNDERSTANDING THE DIFFERENT LEVELS OF MENTAL HEALTH SERVICES

• Outpatient: Individual Outpatient, Intensive Outpatient & Partial Hospitalization
• Inpatient: Emergency Hospitalization, Inpatient Treatment & Extended Care

SECTION 3 – DEALING WITH INSURANCE PROVIDERS

• Traditional Plan, Managed Care Plan & Preferred Provider Plan
• Speaking To Your Insurance Representative

SECTION 4 – INITIATING TREATMENT

• Selecting A Treatment Provider

SECTION 5 – PREPARING YOUR CHILD FOR THE INITIAL THERAPY SESSION

• If Your Child Is Asking For Help – Motivated To Attend
• If Your Child Is Denying/Resisting The Need For Help – Not Motivated
• When There Is A Substance Abuse Concern

SECTION 6 – WHAT TO DO IF YOUR CHILD REFUSES TO ATTEND TREATMENT

• If Your Child Is Experiencing A Psychiatric Emergency
• If Your Child Is Experiencing Mild-Moderate Emotional Difficulties
• If Your Child Is Involved In Destructive And/Or Illegal Behaviors (Including Substance Abuse)

SECTION 7 – IF YOUR CHILD IS EXPERIENCING A PSYCHIATRIC EMERGENCY

• If Your Child Is Uncooperative In Going To The Hospital
• Community Resources That May Be Able To Help You Transport Your Child To The Hospital
• What To Do If Your Child Refuses To Go To The Hospital
• What To Do If You Want Your Child Admitted Into The Hospital
• What To Expect At The Hospital

SECTION 8 – IF YOUR CHILD NEEDS INPATIENT TREATMENT

• If Your Child Is Experiencing Ongoing Psychiatric Or Substance Abuse Difficulties And You Are Considering Inpatient Treatment
• If You Have The Financial Means To Pay For Inpatient Treatment
• If You Have To Depend On Your Insurance Provider To Pay For Inpatient Treatment
• If Your Child Is A Minor And Is Uncooperative In Being Placed In An Inpatient Program
• If Your Child Is Of Adult Age And Is Uncooperative In Being Placed In An Inpatient Program
• An Involuntary Commitment, A Court Order
• If You Are Attempting To Generate A Court Order For Treatment And Your Child Is A Minor If You Are Attempting To Generate A Court Order For Treatment And Your Child Is An Adult

SECTION 9 – UNDERSTANDING YOUR CHILD’S EMOTIONAL/BEHAVIORAL DIFFICULTIES AND RELATED TREATMENT NEEDS

• Different Diagnoses And Their Implication For Treatment
• Difficulties Caused And Maintained By A Life Stressor
• Difficulties Caused And Maintained By A Psychiatric Disorder
• Categories Of Disorders Common To Children And Teenagers
• Table Of Disorders And The Most Effective Treatments As Determined By Consistent Research Findings
• Mood Disorders, Anxiety Disorders, Disruptive Behavior Disorders, Eating Disorders, Substance Abuse Disorders, Thought Disorders & Personality Disorders

SECTION 10 – IF YOUR CHILD IS PRESCRIBED PSYCHOTROPIC MEDICATION

• Stimulant, Antidepressant And Anti-Anxiety, Anti-Psychotic & Mood Stabilizing Medications
• Medications Tables, What Does "Off-Label" Mean & How To Help You Child Take Medication Safely

References
Appendix A – NJ Screening Centers
Appendix B – Psychological Organizations
Appendix C – Self Help Resources

DEDICATION

To all of the parents who have entrusted me with the responsibility of serving as a coach, counselor or therapist to their child. I am in awe of the intensity of the unconditional love you have provided your sons and daughters and the strength and courage with which I have seen you handle difficult times. Thank you for allowing me into your family and sharing with me your concerns, disappointments, triumphs and joys. You have been my greatest teachers in understanding and working with children.

THE BEST STRATEGY FOR UTILIZING THIS HANDBOOK

This handbook is not intended to be read from cover to cover (although you are welcomed to do so), but rather to be used by parents as a resource at the time of information gathering and decision-making regarding counseling services for their child.

If a school counselor, therapist, family member or friend gives you this handbook at a time when you have no immediate need for it, store it in an easy-to-find location. When you are ready to take action in response to your child’s life difficulties, turn to the table of contents and find the section that best matches your situation and area of inquiry. When you have read the selected section, return this handbook back to its easy-to-find location. With emotional, behavioral and/or substance abuse difficulties the road to recovery can be a difficult one. You may need to access this resource again if your child’s situation gets worse and additional intervention and treatment strategies need to be considered.

INTRODUCTION

Most people would agree that parenting is a difficult job under typical parenting conditions (tending to your child’s needs, the stress of long hours at work, taking care of your home, getting along with your spouse/partner, etc.). When you have a child who is experiencing emotional, behavioral and/or substance abuse difficulties, it can be overwhelming.

The purpose of this handbook is to provide parents with a general overview of information and strategies that can be helpful in obtaining counseling services. The premise is, by becoming educated consumers, parents give themselves the best chance of finding their child the most effective treatment available. The information and strategies presented are based on my experiences working with parents as a Student Assistant Coordinator in a public school setting and clinician in private practice.

This handbook is not in any way intended to be used in the intervention, diagnosis or treatment planning of any individual or as a substitute for a mental health consultation with a qualified professional. If you are a parent of a child experiencing life difficulties, it is crucial that before you act on the information or strategies in this handbook you consult with a mental health professional who can advise you on how to handle your specific situation.

If you find yourself in crisis with your child, I encourage you to take a deep breath, slow down, educate yourself, examine all of your options and prepare for all possible worst-case scenarios. Keep in mind that your child’s difficulties probably did not develop overnight, and most certainly will not be resolved overnight. There are absolutely no quick fixes. If you are considering counseling services for your child, I hope that you find this handbook a worthwhile resource.

EXCERPTS TAKEN FROM SEVERAL SECTIONS OF THE HANDBOOK

"It is very difficult for parents to be objective about their own children. Many times they see their children through the eyes of unconditional love. If anyone in your child’s life ever approaches you to express concern about your child, it is important that you give him/her serious consideration. You can assume (once your defensiveness passes) that most people would feel anxious about telling a parent something negative about his/her child. If they do so, their concern for the child’s well-being is serious enough to override their apprehension about telling the parent. If you are ever approached by such a person, consider that individual an objective set of eyes that may very well be aware of something you are not yet able to recognize."

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"A good starting point for obtaining counseling services for your child is to consult with your child’s pediatrician/primary care physician. Have the doctor do a physical examination to determine if a medical condition is causing or contributing to your child’s emotional/behavioral difficulties. Make sure that the physical exam is thorough and includes blood work and, if your child is middle school age or older, a urine drug screen. If your child’s symptoms are not related to a medical condition then mental health or substance abuse treatment may be recommended. If you have an HMO insurance plan, ask your doctor to give you feedback on your list of "in-network" providers. If you have a traditional or PPO plan, ask your doctor to provide you with the names and phone numbers of at least two treatment providers that he/she thinks would be a good match for you and your child."

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"In addition to your doctor, I strongly recommend that you consult with your child’s guidance counselor or another member of the school counseling staff (guidance counselor, social worker, psychologist or student assistance coordinator). School counselors are accustomed to working with children experiencing difficulties and can be a great source of support and expertise in connecting you to a treatment provider in your area."

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"To help determine the probability of a good match between you and a potential treatment provider, it is crucial to conduct a telephone consultation and to ask a lot of questions. Consider your first telephone contact and first therapy session as a two-way interview. While the treatment provider assesses you and your child’s difficulties and treatment needs, you are assessing the treatment provider’s personality, treatment philosophy and skill level. "

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"Since most of us do not have ample experience in directly questioning a professional about his/her expertise, it may feel uncomfortable asking these kinds of questions. I urge you to put aside your discomfort. Not asking questions and adequately assessing the compatibility between you and a potential treatment provider, increases your risk of wasting your time, money and hope."

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"If your primary concern with your child is substance abuse, you can probably expect a very high level of denial, resistance and anger from your child when informing him/her of your plan to take him/her to a counselor. Be prepared to handle and not allow your child’s resistance to deter you from your planned course of action. If you are a single parent and you do not have the support of your child’s other parent, you may want to ask another adult family member to assist and accompany you to your first treatment session. "

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"It is important to note that if your child undergoes a drug and alcohol urine screen and it returns negative, it does not conclusively mean that your child is not using drugs or alcohol or that his/her current difficulties are not being caused or compounded by his/her use."

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"Because of the numerous variables that impact on the results of a drug test, no one test should be considered 100% conclusive regarding an individual’s substance involvement. It is recommended that drug test be administered as part of a comprehensive mental health/substance abuse evaluation facilitated by a professional trained in the treatment of substance abuse. A professional trained in substance abuse can advise parents on the probability of substance involvement beyond that indicated by the drug test results."

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"What makes the tough love approach difficult to institute is that it goes against most parents’ natural instinct to protect their child from perceived harm and to avoid the interpersonal pressure inherent to saying no or imposing a consequence. Generally speaking, in some ways it is easier to yell, argue, nag or try to guilt our children into compliance than it is to hold them accountable and impose a logical consequence that often initially escalates their agitation and anger. Ultimately however, research and my own clinical experience suggest that children (particularly those with behavioral difficulties) learn and are more influenced by our actions in response to their behavior than by our words or emotions. For additional information and support in implementing a tough love approach with your child, contact the tough love support program at (800) 333-1069 or visit www.toughlove.org."

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"All counties have a psychiatric screening center (see appendix A). The centers are located in designated county hospitals. Some centers serve more than one county. They are staffed by mental health professionals known as "screeners". The role of the screener is to both protect an individual from self-harm in cases of a psychiatric emergency and to advocate for an individual’s right against involuntary hospitalization. Screeners intervene in situations when an individual appears to be experiencing a psychiatric emergency but is refusing medical assistance."

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"In cases when an individual appears to be having a psychiatric emergency, but is uncooperative in going to the hospital, many screening centers have a Mobil Unit that they deploy to the individual’s location. The mobile unit consists of 1-3 screeners accompanied by members of the local police department. Upon their arrival they evaluate the individual’s mental status. If they believe that a psychiatric emergency exists and that the individual is of danger to him/herself or others, then they exercise their legal authority to have the police bring the individual to the hospital against his/her will. Some screening centers (Morris, Passaic and Warren County) do not deploy their mobile unit in situations involving a minor (any person under the age of 18). If you live in such a county, you may need to get assistance from your local police department (read the Local Police Department section below)."

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"While all counties have a Psychiatric Screening Centers that you can contact in cases of a psychiatric emergency, some screening centers (Morris, Passaic and Warren County) do not deploy their mobile unit in situations involving a minor (any person under the age of 18). If your child is a minor and you live in such a county, you will need to contact your local police department for assistance. In psychiatric emergencies, police departments have the authority to assist parents in transporting a minor to the hospital. Police departments seem to vary in their level of sophistication in dealing with individuals (particularly minors) experiencing a psychiatric and/or substance abuse emergency. When involving your local police department, be prepared for all possible personalities, styles and protocols in how they intervene with your child. Regardless of their approach, remember that the important thing is that your child gets to the hospital where he/she can be further evaluated and treated."

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"If at the hospital you want you child admitted for emergency hospitalization treatment, communicate your request directly to the evaluating clinician. Tell him/her exactly what your child is doing that makes you believe emergency hospitalization treatment is necessary. Make sure you highlight behaviors that indicate your child may be of danger to him/herself or others. If it appears that the hospital is reluctant to admit your child, ask to fill out a request/application for hospitalization form. Doing so will document your concerns and thus force the hospital to give even greater consideration to your request. Be aware however, that no matter how strongly and effectively you communicate your request, the hospital can choose not to admit your child for emergency hospitalization."

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"Inpatient treatment may be appropriate for ongoing psychiatric or substance abuse difficulties when an individual is experiencing life impairment and/or has had previous treatment attempts that failed in improving his/her condition. The decision to place an individual in inpatient treatment is a serious one that is subject to strict insurance guidelines and mental health legislature. It is not easy to have someone placed in inpatient treatment against his/her will. Inpatient treatment is most often utilized as the last line of treatment for ongoing psychiatric or substance abuse difficulties typically administered after prior treatment attempts have failed. There are exceptions to this protocol. If an individual is suicidal or homicidal or if there are other serious potentially self-injurious symptoms (including severe drug addition or dangerously low body weight due to an eating disorder), inpatient treatment may be used as the first line of treatment. "

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"An involuntary commitment is when an individual (minor or adult age) is forced by the mental health system to enter inpatient care against his/her will. It is very difficult to have a person "committed". Your best chance of doing so occurs when there is a psychiatric emergency in which your child is overtly expressing thoughts of suicide or homicide, appears psychotic and or is engaging in potentially dangerous behaviors. If your child is experiencing a psychiatric emergency, follow the instructions outlined in Section 7. In addition, inform the evaluating mental health professional that you believe your child is in need of inpatient care and should be involuntarily committed. Another process by which an individual can be involuntarily committed is when a treating psychiatrist determines that inpatient treatment is the most appropriate level of care. In such cases your treatment provider should work with you in making the necessary arrangements for hospitalization and inpatient placement."

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"A court order for treatment is when an individual (minor or adult age) is mandated by the criminal justice system to enter treatment or face more serious legal consequences. If you want to generate a court order for treatment to be imposed on your child, you will need to follow a "tough love" parenting philosophy. When your child is involved in criminal activity including substance abuse, you notify the police in order to initiate your child’s involvement with the criminal justice system. Once your child is involved in the criminal justice system, you work collaboratively with the judge and/or probation officer assigned to your child’s case. By informing and/or keeping them abreast of your child’s criminal behavior and asking them for help, you will increase the likelihood that the judge and probation officer will impose a court order for treatment (possibly inpatient care)."

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"If you are attempting to generate a court order for treatment and your child is a minor, find some reassurance in knowing that the juvenile justice system is set up to rehabilitate rather than punish. Juvenile records are typically expunged at the age of 21. By getting your child involved with the juvenile justice system, you will be providing him/her with a level of consequences that are mild in comparison to the consequences that may occur as a result of his/her disruptive, dangerous and/or substance abusing behaviors. In the process you will be taking advantage of a window of opportunity that only exists until your child’s eighteenth birthday and can possibly give you the leverage needed to motivate him/her to enter and participate in treatment."

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"Regardless of the treatment provider you choose or the level of care to be provided, effective treatment should begin with a comprehensive initial assessment/evaluation of your child’s difficulties and related treatment needs. The length of time it takes for an initial assessment varies from 2-5 hours (conducted over 1-5 sessions), depending on the treatment provider’s professional training and/or treatment philosophy. The goal of the assessment is to determine what is causing and/or maintaining your child’s difficulties and how to effectively intervene. In order to have a comprehensive understanding of your child’s difficulties, many treatment providers will want to get input from other caretakers, school officials and other agencies or treatment providers working with your child. A treatment provider would need your written consent in order to speak to anyone outside of you and your child."

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"Please note that there are a number of disorders that are resistant to individual talk therapy (as defined in section 2 of this handbook). With disorders that are considered biological in nature and/or characterized by a child’s unwillingness to acknowledge life difficulties, a lack of motivation for change, blaming others for one’s life difficulties and/or a resistance to participating in therapy, the focus of treatment becomes the family dynamics and parenting style. The hope is to assist parents and family members in creating a home environment that serves to reduce stress, teach healthy coping strategies and motivate the child to work on changing maladaptive patterns of thoughts, emotions and behaviors."

"If you bring your child to a treatment provider with the hope that he/she be "fixed", it can feel invalidating and frustrating to hear that the focus of treatment will need to be on your family dynamics or parenting style. The recommendation may seem to imply that you are in some way the cause of your child’s difficulties. If you are given the recommendation of parent training or some other family focused intervention, please understand that it is not an indictment of your parenting but rather a reflection of the nature of your child’s difficulties and the limitations of standard individual outpatient therapy. Traditional "instinctive parenting" need to be supplemented by parenting strategies and skills specific to your child’s difficulty."

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"While medication rarely should be the only strategy used, in some cases it may be a key component to effective treatment. If your child’s treatment provider believes that your child could benefit from medication, he/she will refer you to a psychiatrist or your primary care physician. Medications can only be recommended and prescribed by a medical doctor (MD). The decision to accept a doctor’s recommendation for medication can be difficult. Issues to be considered are the age of your child, severity of emotional and/or behavioral difficulties, level of life impairment, your child’s degree of cooperation and the potential benefit versus risk of the medication. As parents you will want to ask your child’s doctor many questions, research the medication(s) being recommended and carefully think over your final decision."

TABLE 2 - MEDICATIONS

STIMULANT MEDICATIONS

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"When your child is being evaluated and considered for psychotropic medication, it is essential that you provide the doctor with a thorough history of your child's medical problems, any medications your child is taking, including over-the-counter medications or vitamin and herbal supplements, and any allergic reactions your child has suffered. If a medication is prescribed for your child, there are certain questions you should ask. It will be helpful to take notes as it is easy to forget exactly what the doctor says."

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"I encourage you, no matter how afraid, angry, frustrated, resentful and/or sad you might be feeling about your child’s difficulties and the attempts you have made to get him/her help, don’t give up. Don’t ever give up. Change is not an event it is a process. Even if what you are currently doing does not seem to be having an impact, you never know when the cumulative effective of all your efforts will cause something to click and your child to choose a new course in life. Professionally I have been privileged to witness numerous patients make radical changes despite long histories of pain, dysfunction and previous treatment failures. Their successes ensure me that good things are possible for those who stay committed to the change process. "

Good luck to you!